Breathe in; exhale...

3:12AM - ...

damn. it sucks when you know something is gonna happen, and like no matter how much you're prepared, it still hurts. it almost hurts worse because you knew it was coming. i'm so stupid though, like it was extremely obvious. and it wasnt even supposed to be serious, i just think too much into everything. everything. never fail. goodnight.

12:19PM

so i've been in jersey for just under 3 weeks, and i come home this thursday. i gotta say, i'm pretty done with being here. i'm at a music seminar and while i still love all the classes and everything i'm actually here for, the other things are getting to me. however today is the student concert, where all 25 of us voted on 10 to play at this concert, and i was one of the ones chosen. i'm a little nervous, but should be good. i'm playing bach's gavotte en rondeau from the E major partita on marimba...

i don't know why i even wrote in this thing. i guess there are so many things i want to say but theres no one to say them too. and more than that, i don't actually think the things i want to say need to be said; like they're just me thinking too hard and being negative.

i just want to come home! ugh!

11:18AM

12:36PM - bohemian rhapsody

so my band, oh the story, encored this song this past friday night at recher theatre. check it out. if the vocals are kinda eh in the beginning its all me i got out of pitch lol.

7:24PM - rothbury

this isnt even a journal entry. this is just me saying that last weekend i went to rothbury music festival up in michigan, and it was seriously the best fucking weekend of my entire life. and next year's is just too far away.

12:35AM - greatest day ever!

so i never update this thing, but after todays events, i just need to tell the story.

k. oh, the story played some dumb graduation party last night, and long story short, one of our guitars was stolen.

lets just say, after banging on a few doors and an awesome 4 hour private eye investigation, the best feeling i've ever had was watching chris walk out of this asshole's house holding his guitar. we're super lucky to even get the guitar back... i know so many instances of once something is gone, it's never seen again. what a great fucking day!



i realize that in the grand scheme of updating, after the first one in decades, i should probably update. but i wont. bye!

11:26AM - you are beautiful, but you don't mean a thing to me

i havent updated this bad boy in a real long time, and i'm not going to now.

i'm only writing to say that the movie Blood Diamond was fucking so awesome, and everyone should go see it.

maybe one day i'll write.




oh yea, and the new season of one tree hill is intense son! fast forward 4 years! its crazy!

11:18PM - ...

birthday's are really just any other day...however i feel like usually your birthday is more of a magnet for bad things as opposed to the catalyst for good things (in that statement, i'm saying the latter should be what a birthday is.)

oh well. another year older. 18 was a good year for me. i'm not who i used to be, and it's really cool. lets hope 19 is more positive.

10:42PM - ocho cinco!

although i dont really care for the falcons, and i especially dont care about michael vick anymore... i just wish i could sit down to watch a football game and not have to listen to the news about that fucking idiots dogfighting charges. i know whats happening. i watch sportscenter and pti and nfl live and every other god damn show on espn, and all they talk about is vick. now i go to turn on monday night football, and all they talk about is vick again. i feel so bad for the falcons, because they're just stuck in his shadow, and i'm 100% sure that's not where they want to be.

update: see, i'm watching it right now, and right before this lady started her interview with the new falcons qb, joey harrington, she said something like "we're not allowed to talk about michael vick, so lets talk to joey harrington about joey harrington." how fucked up is that? shouldnt they always talk to the players about themselves?

oh well. i just wish ocho cinco got in the endzone more...even though he's saving his dances for the monday night game vs. the ravens. i love chad johnson...i think he's hilarious. but i do believe we'll leave a stomping in the bengals.

12:50PM - three strips of bacon on my toast and head

i dont know why the thing didnt want to be the thing in the fantastic four. if i was a big strong rock guy, i would be all about it. but i can understand why he was upset. honestly, he was pretty ugly. it would be awesome to be the human torch. and although reed richards is a dick, it would be pretty cool to be mr fantastic too.

i would really like to swing around like spiderman, even though i think that peter parker is a little queer boy. or wolverine, but that's obvious.

1:58AM - Brand New at the Borgata, Atlantic City

Coca Cola
Luca
The Archer Bows Have Broken
The Shower Scene
Millstone
Limousine
Okay I Believe You But My Tommy Gun Doesn't
Sic Transit Gloria... Glory Fades
Jaws Theme Swimming
Untitled 5 (Cleanser)
Play Crack The Sky
Untitled 1 (Found a Good Man)
Welcome To Bangkok
Sowing Season
Jesus Christ
Handcuffs
Degausser
You Won't Know


this show is tied with rams head last june, in their best performances i've seen. and if for just this reason, its the best because they played the 2 untitled's, and i can almost guarantee that will never happen ever again. plus i recorded some awesome videos on my phone. and i stopped in philly to get a cheesesteak on the way back.

success.

12:04PM - conundrum

this perplexes me:

my mom yells at me when i ask her for money, saying i need to go get a job. yet, for the past week, she's taken my car to work while hers has been in the shop, so i havent had a car to go anywhere so i could try and find a job...

i'm confused.

2:50AM - once again, we're playing with emotions

i'm back home in baltimore, and although it feels amazing to be with my real friends and family again, i cant help but miss boston. the city was very therapeutic to me for some reason...i dont know. maybe i'm just being weird.

we saw the ex last night, and it was great. i thought it was gonna be really bad, because of how bad the reviews and stuff was, but it was hilarious. i was supposed to see shrek with my mom tonight, but we ended up spending too much time at kobe's and winded up missing the movie. after that, i went over dave's and then me, dave, justin, and joe played 50. then we went to joes and lit tennis balls on fire and hit them with a wiffle ball bat. then they launched a few of them on me while on fire and i tried to hit them with the bat, but it was tough...everytime there was any form of impact on the ball, there was an explosion of fire, so it was scary to get close.

i'm just about ready for my mouth to stop hurting from getting my wisdom teeth out. its been a week now. i've been miserable all week...its time for this to be over.


summer is great and all, and though its still early, i feel like there's so much more for me to do and learn before i go back to school in september. there's a lot missing, and i guess i need to find everything, and put the pieces together.

11:22AM - dont try to ask a doctor whats going on inside your head

i am so curious as to how this school even works...all of my musical life, i've always been told that for whatever the occasion, be it audition, performance, playing test, whatever...you are supposed to dress the part; i.e. wear a suit or at least try to look like you didnt just roll out of bed. granted, i didnt always follow that rule in high school because i could get by it, but now that i'm here, i follow that rule like i live by it. what confuses me though, is that no one here gives a damn. so i wonder if i really make an impression walking into an audition room wearing a suit, as opposed to someone just wearing jeans and a t-shirt. who knows with berklee...this place is ridic. lol.



brand new fucked up bamboozle so bad, and it makes me so happy. you'd think that most people wouldnt like a band who are dicks, but for some reason, what brand new did, makes me love them even more. yes, maybe they shouldnt even waste their time with bamboozle, but regardless, they're a working band and they got money, and you have to do what your job tells you to do. i love them. i cant wait to see them again in 3 weeks!

ps fuck taking back sunday, they're fags!

Current mood: good

Current music: "Monkey" by Saves the Day

11:14AM - Saves the Day/ Say Anything: Boston, MA Avalon 5-3-07

Three Miles Down
The End
Anywhere With You
Bones
Freakish
As Your Ghost Takes Flight
Nightengale
Rocks Tonic Juice Magic
Eulogy
Can't Stay The Same
Shoulder to the Wheel (with Jake from Say Anything on guitar while Chris just sang)
Head For The Hills
At Your Funeral
Holly Hox
Firefly




Alive With The Glory of Love
Belt
Woe
Metal Now
Yellow Cat (Slash) Red Cat
People Like You Are Why People Like Me Exist (new song)
The Futile
Every Man Has A Molly

(Encore)
Wow, I Can Get Sexual Too
Admit It!!!

11:13PM

Okay I Believe You But My Tommy Gun Don't
Jaws Theme Swimming
The Shower Scene
The No Seatbelt Song
Sic Transit Gloria... Glory Fades
The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot
Good To Know That If I Ever Need Attention All I Have To Do Is Die
Play Crack The Sky
Sowing Season
Millstone
The Archers Bows Have Broken
Luca
Handcuffs
Limousine
Jesus Christ
Degausser
You Won't Know
Welcome To Bangkok

11:28AM - be my breath; there's nothing i wouldn't give

so today and tomorrow prove to be amazing.

currently, jake and my brother are about to board an airplane to boston, and they will be here in 2 hours. then we're going to tour the city and get rip-roaring drunk, and then tonight, we're going to go see brand new at the avalon, which is a 10 minute walk from my dorm. then tomorrow, we're going to cause mischief all over the city of boston until they have to get back on the plane to go home, around like 8 at night, i think. then i'll come back and resume my normal, boring life. but with that aside, life is great!

the weather is finally here and i'm so happy! i've worn short sleeves every day for the whole weekend! it's 70 degrees right now! yay!

so i suppose thats it. i'll be home in 2 weeks, for the whole summer! thats pretty exciting too...until early september. what do you want to do?

10:29AM - i cant stand my own face anymore

so berklee, even though i didnt know it was possible, outdid themselves this time.

i was supposed to have an audition with the chairman of the percussion dept. at noon, so i woke up all early, put on my suit, and got there at 11:30, plenty of time. i sat around until about 12:30, when he finally got there, and he told me to wait just 1 minute. i then watched him conduct some ensemble for about 20 minutes. after he got out of there, and i had been waiting for about an hour and a half already, he told me that there was a "big" clinic going on in the upstairs ensemble hall, and he had to be there, and said i should go to because of how "informative" it would be. however, if "big" means 10 people, and "informative" means a guy who insists on not using a microphone even though you cant hear him...then i guess i got exactly what he said i was getting. so after sitting in this clinic until 2:30, the chairman, dean anderson, finally told me to come downstairs for the audition. we go down into his office, and he says..."i can't do this today. come back tomorrow."

thank you dean anderson, you're saving the world. i sat in this fucking building for 3 hours, in a suit, that now has to be dry cleaned because it was raining, and also, you just dont wear suits 2 days in a row. plus, i never even got to breakfast or anything. plus i skipped my english class for the audition, which was moved to today, so i had to skip my english class again today. this guy is a waste of life.


so this summer, we got some GREAT shows!

april 24 - BRAND NEW (here in boston...jake and jeremy are flying up)
may 3 - saves the day and say anything (again, here in boston)
may 28 - BRAND NEW again! (this time, in atlantic city, nj.)

and then sometime throughout the summer, i'll be going to virgin fest, john mayer and ben folds, and hopefully, if they come through, 311 and matisyahu. its gonna be a great summer.

1:16AM

i'm such a loser. there are so many things that i want to do in my life, and i know that most of them, i'll never get to do. i feel like i'm such a waste. maybe i can get something out of this summer. i probably wont though.

10:32AM - there's no connection

i'm currently working on my schedule next year. aside from my basics (ear training and harmony), and my required drum lab, i'm also taking an intro. to timpani class, which i'm positive will be easy, but its required for my instrument. and then i'm taking a class called "survey of percussion studies" which will be all about drums and how they've changed over the years, so that will be awesome. and my favorite class i'm taking is a class called "the music of john lennon" which you can probably figure out what that is. and then i have my 2 ensembles, which i havent picked yet. probably a jazz band and a wind ensemble or something classical-like. next year, i might take an ensemble/class called "the music of bob marley" where you just learn about him and then you play his music. i'm so interested in learning about all of these huge musicians, who i already love and respect. so it makes me want to take these classes. one day, it all will pay off.


WHAT DOES EVERYONE WANT TO DO ONE DAY? LIKE FOR YOUR JOB, OR YOUR GOALS FOR LATER IN LIFE? COMMENT BACK! I'LL TELL YOU MINE!